Self-control is the third virtue necessary to enhance in kids in order to build strong character. This virtue helps kids put on the brakes when they are tempted to strike out at something or someone. Taking the time to teach kids that actions have consequences can make the difference in a child’s ability to halt aggressive behavior. Dr. Borba suggests taking a few minutes a day to practice 1+3+10. Dr. Borba says as soon as you feel your body sending you a warning sign that says you’re losing control, do three things. First, stop and tell yourself: ‘be calm.” That’s 1. Second, take three deep slow breaths from your tummy. That’s 3. Now count slowly to ten inside your head. That’s 10. Put them all together, it’s 1 + 3 +10, and doing it helps you calm down and get back in control.
Living in a time when there is so much information and direction to raising great kids leaves parents with an obvious dilemma. Prioritizing the events in kids’ lives to ensure they have the best possible coping skills and the greatest chance for success in the ultimate parenting challenge today. However, scheduling time to nurture character in kids will go a long way to making sure that the love and attention given to them pays off. Research is clear. The only proven way to virtually guarantee children possess the traits of character and virtues is to schedule time in every day to teach the value of the moment.
Use the many challenges kids face to guide them in the direction of compassion, generosity, self-control, kindness and other essential virtues that arm kids for life with a caring heart and mind.
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