I would have to agree with that ringing endorsement of Susan Jeffers' self-help classic. This wonderful book, the author's first published work, represented her successful endeavor "in taking the concept of fear out of the realm of therapy and into the area of education."
Ms. Jeffers (a Ph.D. in psychology) does not promise that change will be easy, but she does know her subject well, and offers some pointed insights, inspiring calls to action and powerful but accessible techniques to help "start taking charge of your life." Moreover, her prose is a pleasure to read.
As she points out the "secret in handling fear is moving yourself from a position of pain to a position of power. . .the fear then becomes irrelevant." As a matter of fact, whatever your fear, that should be your next step. If you fear public speaking--feared more than death by most people--your next move should be joining a "Toastmasters" group. There you can take some "baby steps" in a supportive environment as you overcome your problem. As you get used to speaking in front of your peers, you begin to wonder just why you were so afraid in the first place.
A technique presented by Ms. Jeffers that really helped turn my life from a negative emphasis to a more life-affirming one was to make a list of 150 positive events in my life, past or present. As I worked on my list, examining past events in my life, I began to see that I had lived a much fuller life than I had previously thought.
Many events that seemed negative at the time actually had a silver lining or were not as adverse as I had thought. For example, I changed my attitude towards a previous relationship that had ended disastrously, as I saw that this person and I had actually enjoyed many happy times together, and that we apparently needed to be together for a while though not permanently. I found myself laughing with amusement at some of our moments together. There was some joy with that person that I had forgotten about as I concentrated too heavily on the pain of our separation.
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