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"Parlez vous Travel?"

© Diane Goldberg under the original topic name

Whether you are driving two hours on a weekend getaway or hopping a freighter to Thailand, learning travelspeak will smooth your journey.

Travelspeak is a language frequently spoken by folks who confuse you utterly under the guise of providing information. Travelspeak encompasses both the rules of the road and the customs of the country called travel-land. To further mystify you there are multiple dialects, rituals, and routines.

If you are experiencing the light-headedness of jet lag and the disorientation of interstate driving with an upside down map, you are ready to begin.

Lesson 1: Car travel

Take a map. Had Moses done so, he would have enjoyed a weekend break in Eilat, breakfast included, instead of passing away before he entered the Promised Land. Even if you rely on http://www.mapquest.com or an AAA triptick for your route, there is no substitute for a map; it will give you and your partner something to argue about.

All sodas, snacks, and sanitary supplies cost an amount equal to the budget of an emerging African nation at all highway stores. Budget travelers who journey by car pack coolers.

Desperation breeds expense. One of the advantages of car travel is that you can transport everything you might want to have. Supermarkets and drug stores in resort areas are often higher priced to feed off tourists.

Often you can find a room within your price range through luck. But, if you budget to the penny, you would do well to book in advance.

If you plan to spend a weekend in a city that caters to business travelers during the week call every available hotel chain and ask about weekend specials. Most chains that rely on business travel have reduced weekend rates. [This rule is a Nearly Universal Truth; working as often in Paris as it does in Washington, DC]

Lesson 2: Railtravel

I have the same relationship to rail passes that an alcoholic has to the bottle.

One is not enough; I want them all. I read the Thomas Cook rail schedule recreationally and plot routes from Paris to Istanbul. Just the sight of the Britrail logo gets me happily planning the best route from Leeds to Aberdeen - never mind that I don't particularly want to be in either city.

Rail passes are seductive. Like Circe singing, they will lure you to rocks and shoals. Once you've had one you may not care about the cost - you'll want another and another.

Rail passes can be the best bargain available. They really can save you hundreds of dollars.

The copyright of the article "Parlez vous Travel?" in Traveling on a Budget is owned by Diane Goldberg under the original topic name. Permission to republish "Parlez vous Travel?" in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.