"Oops, I did it again."

No, Ms Budget Travel has not become a Brittany Spears fan. Not that I have anything against the little darling, it's merely that she doesn't figure on my cultural compass. But, I couldn't resist the headline. Mea culpa

Yes, I've done it again . . .

Greed leads to stupidity

When will I learn?

Probably never

A few weeks ago, I answered the phone and heard the perky voice of a sales droid chirping away at me about vacation offerings. She used a phrase that sets me to salivating like one of Pavlov's dogs discount vacations . So, of course, reason fled. I was hooked like a farm-raised catfish.

Oh, I tired. I did. I asked her two times to clarify. "This isn't a time share pitch, is it?"

"Oh, no," she said, "this is a program to get discount bookings on airfare and cruises."

And, of course, they were offering the inducement of free hotel nights and a free meal should we trot on down to Ft. Mill to hear their pitch. Okay, so I wanted to go to Red Lobster.

It was, of course, the standard time share pitch, complete with an hour or more of imprisonment while a fast talking, adrenaline charged, pinky-ringed guy drew little squares on large pieces of paper and repeated, "You can own your vacation or you can rent your vacation." After sufficient recitation of said phrase, the eyes of the audience glaze over and a few of the hostages seemed to mutter it redundantly.

So, what's wrong with time-share?

Well, first of all, Ms Budget Travel has an innate suspicion of any aggressively marketed product that comes with a bribe to ensure an audience for the sales pitch. Particularly a travel product --- British Airways is not yet giving out free meals to get me to buy tickets.

However, let's look at the time-share concept through the eyes of a budget traveler. The presumption is that you spend a particular amount; their guess was eighty dollars on a hotel room. We know better.

Further, they inform you in sonorous tones that the price of travel goods and services is going up. (And, what has happened to airfare since deregulation?)

And, then they tell you that one of your benefits is that rooms at your resort must often be booked 13 months in advance. This is a benefit?

In the standard time share scheme you pay around 22,000 for a week and one half annual stay at a facility they call a five star resort. I don't know what star system they use but the units are what the Brits call "self catering" and rooms seldom have king sized beds.

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