It is the acceptance of the paradoxical irony that is the very nature of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) that is at the epicenter of recovery.
Paradox exists within the center of contradiction. The apparent contradiction for those with BPD is found in the reality that what is understood and perceived borderline reality is not in essence real in the here and now. Rather, what is perceived and/or experienced in distorted ways now is really the dissociative re-experiencing of past traumatic events. In the active throes of BPD, borderlines, more often than not, are unaware of this.
The inability to distinguish between the past and the here and now in times of triggered regressive dissociation is the root of the irony. This irony is housed within the borderline incongruity between what might be expected (or what one erroneously misperceives as unfolding) and what actually is occurring.
The paradox that must be understood and held in your awareness is that all you do to protect yourself from pain causes you more pain. BPD is a maze of distorted thoughts. Recovery begins with accepting this and being in the awareness of this.
The paradox that one needs to be aware of and develop a profound understanding of that is required for recovery and healing is that you need to learn how to accept that you have this painful personality disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, (BPD) and that much of what you experience that is so painful and difficult is not congruent with what is actually happening in the here and now and that all of this pain and fear (more accurately understood and accepted) also holds within it the hope and possibility of recovery.
In order for change and recovery to be possible where Borderline Personality Disorder is concerned you must first accept what it is. You must admit and acknowledge it. You must accept what its effects are the experience of your life. You must accept it and all the pain that comes with it. You must also know that you are not BPD; you are someone who has BPD. Not everything about your personhood is about BPD.
You need to know that the pain that you experience as the result of BPD is the very pain that awaits your acceptance and awareness of it so that you can indeed heal it.
If you can get there; stand there. Just stand there in an unfolding awareness of what BPD means to and in your life
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