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Blended Family Challenges

© Aaron Joseph Goebel

Biological Families slowly develop their traditions and routines. They grow and learn together. In a step-family, each side of the family comes together with its set of traditions already established. Often these traditions are different and don't mix very well. Compromises must be reached as the family learns to combine old traditions and add new ones.

Usually family roles emerge over a period of time as the family grows. The expectations of each family member are clearly established. In a step-family, roles are not so clear.

Couples often wonder how to be step-parents, how to develop a good relationship with children they are still getting to know, and how to discipline their new step-children

Children wonder how to respond to a new father-figure who isn't their dad, or a step-mother who tries to be a mother to them. Sometimes family members aren't even sure what to call each other.

All this can be confusing enough, especially for a child. But now we add the fact that the children will change households every so often. They must learn to fit in with two different households, each having a different routine and even different rules.

As you can see, step-families have many issues to work through right from the beginning. The good news is that step-families are starting to receive more recognition and help is being offered, especially on the Net. I've listed a few very good places to start:

http://www.drheller.com/stepfam.html

http://www.divorce--resource.com/step_fa...

http://www.naturalstep.org/

http://www.stepcarefully.com/

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