Fast Food Fast Women
Sep 18, 2001 -
© James C. Hess
has a girlfriend (don't they all?) who has always wanted to be in the movies. And she has found out the moneyman has a script he is going to finance, and she wants to be in the movie. Which leads to one of many problems: This is a buddy movie, not a chick flick. In plain English, then: There. Are. No. Chicks. In. This. Movie. The moneyman and the girlfriend have a loud argument over this. The girlfriend wins and the moneyman issues an edict: No chicks, no money. So this means the script has to be rewritten. Right? Right. But not by yours truly. Oh, no. Gotta have a new screenwriter. Someone who is 'fresh' and 'original'. In other words: The moneyman's girlfriend's brother (who has always wanted to write for the movies). So I wave them a fond farewell and return to the partially medicated dog who still needs-- Wait a minute! This isn't my dog. Y'see? Now I'm worming dogs that belong to other people! So anyway, I go off and do whatever it was I was doing before I got hired to do whatever it was I didn't do on this production. And that's the end of that. Right? Wrong. While I am off doing something else--writing movie and film reviews, for example--certain events transpire: The moneyman and his girlfriend break up. Which means the screenwriter gets fired. Which means all the rewrites he did get thrown out. Which means. . . Back to the original screenplay. Which means. . . I get hired again. (Assuming, of course, I'm foolish enough to get involved once again. I am. It's a good script.) So I am hired once more to rewrite again. Which I do. But then the moneyman disappears and everything gets put on hold. Or does it? To make a long story short, eventually, by way of something just this side of a miracle the idea that started it all becomes a movie or film. I know: Why am I telling you this? I am telling you this because, more often than not, THIS is how movies and films get made nowadays. Specifically "Fast Food Fast Women". After sitting through "Fast Food Fast Women" a question remained: If THIS is the end result what was the idea in the first place? I doubt anyone attached to "Fast Food Fast Women" knows. I say this because this could have been a good flick. Oh, yes. It could have. It should have been, with the real story being about a romance between two secondary, supporting characters.
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