A Knight's Tale

It does.

In a time when fourth-graders cannot read at grade level, Pauley Shore can make his nth comeback, and a television series entitled "Malcolm in the Middle" is deigned High Art, it makes sense that someone, somewhere would deliberately 'dumb down' the classics.

Specifically, Chaucer.

It makes sense.

Further, it goes to explain why a movie the likes of "A Knight's Tale" will undoubtedly succeed at the box office. Why not? If Pauley Shore can succeed, anyone can!

To "A Knight's Tale", then. (Which, incidentally, is a very, very, very fast-and-loose, severely watered-down version of "The Canterbury Tales".)

Heath Ledger stars as William, a servant to a knight. Who, unfortunately for William, is killed. Because the noble knight is dead William and his other servants find themselves in a bad situation: Unless someone comes up with a way to address this lack of master they will not only be eating dung but they will most likely become dung.

Before you can say 'what-ho' there appears along a man. Naked, desperate, wild-eyed, he claims he can give William and his fellow servants what they want: Freedom.

Of course there is a price for this: The man in question must be fed, clothed.

I know: How can such a person provide William his freedom? By way of something called 'patents': Documents that effectively make someone like William a noble.

Yes. These proposed documents are forgeries. But no worries. The man who says he can provide them is none other than Chaucer (Paul Bettany).

This. Then that. William gains the forged patents, acquires the dead knight's suit of armor, picks up a couple of sidekicks--Roland and Wat (Mark Addy, Alan Tudyk), puts himself through a training course so as to be convincing as a knight, and--

Off to the jousting they go.

About jousting: It is a bit like golf. Except instead of a small white ball you have a knight in shining armor you have to strike.

Before he strikes you.

Of course William proves to be a natural at this, and derails one opponent after another.

Until. . .

The evil Count Adhemar (Rufus Sewell).

Even if you never read Chaucer you know what comes next, don't you? Of course you do.

But the director of "A Knight's Tale", Brian Helgeland, thinks otherwise. How to explain all the women in this movie? Including Lady Jocelyn (Shannyn Sossamon), whose father just happens to be the ruler?

"A Knight's Tale" is the cinematic version of "Cliff Notes". Despite this fact I suspect people will go to see it again and again.

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