Little Nicky

I declined to do so.

To this day I have no regrets about this.

Reason: Adam Sandler, on first impression, is the sort of guy you find funny. Superficially and initially he comes across as talented, quick, smart.

But after a very short period of time you come to the realization he really isn't funny, talented, quick, smart, or the sort of person you want around because he will betray you so that he can remain center-stage.

Reason: His acting range is, at best, limited. His humor is pop culture flash-in-the-pan stuff, and his comedic abilities are made up of obnoxious voices and characters easily relagated to the flaming-poo-in-a-paper-bag department.

I think privately he knows all this, but denies it in a public arena. Doing so causes a strangeness in him that goes to show what he is, what he will be: A stand-up comic who is reduced to playing a one-note character again and again.

Albeit for bigger and bigger paychecks.

Take as example of this opinion Sandler's latest, "Little Nicky", in which he plays Nicky, the spawn of Satan.

Nicky is a whiny, lispy, village idiot of sorts who has been abused in variety of ways by his brothers, Cassius (Tommy "Tiny" Lister, Jr.) and Adrian (Rhys Ifans).

On the surface this could be an interesting premise, owing much to the actors who play Cassius and Adrian. But since Sandler has nothing to work with in terms of talent and ability, the premise is quickly reduced to mindless Hollywood cliches.

The premise: Satan (Harvey Keitel) has been doing his gig as the ruler of the dark side for around 10,000 years. Which means retirement could be in sight. But Satan decides not to retire (for reasons not worth mentioning here). It is a decision that understandably upsets Cassius and Adrian, who flee Hell, and who seal the gates to Hell as punishment against their father.

Now. Because the gates to Hell are sealed no new souls arrive for Satan to feed on, which means he starts to--oh, how to put this--go to pieces.

Literally. Like a bad turn on Jeff Goldblum in "The Fly", Satan loses this and then that: An ear, a bit of flesh. Before long he is reduced to almost nothing.

Nicky, the doting son, is concerned about this, and manages, despite the gates being sealed, to follow his brothers to their new Hell: Manhattan, where a bulldog that talks, named Beefy, befriends him.

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