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Did You Feel It?

© Lee Brown

"It moved, did you feel it?" she asked excitedly holding her husband's hand to her extended belly.

"I sure did. Remind me to go to the sports shop tomorrow and buy a football." He was just as excited as she was. Their first son. He knew it was a boy. He just knew it.

She, on the other hand, knew it was going to be a little girl. The kick was a perfect kick from her last jazz dance class.

While they never argued about the sex of their yet unborn child, both knew what the other wanted. Every woman wants a daughter to dress up and make cute. Every man wants a boy to play catch with or take fishing. Yet, no matter what, they don't really care as long as it's healthy.

Several days later, the kicks had stopped. The feelings carried by the mother had changed. She knew something was wrong. A trip to the obstetrician confirmed her suspicions. While being admitted to the hospital, anxiety reined her thoughts. Hours after first being examined, she is told that the child would not be delivered and that it was quite possible she would never be able to have further pregnancies.

What would cause such a calamity? Why would God punish her for being exactly what was expected of her - being a mother? Yet, in reality these questions have no bearing at all on the problem. As it turns out, this woman was not fated to have children for the simple reason that should she deliver, there was a very good chance that she would not survive it. The child would be motherless.

Although many of us cling to the thought that we are being tormented for not being able to have children or losing a loved one, there are always reasons for the torments. Should we request that the loved one remain here in this life in unending pain or do we show the tender mercy required in letting them pass onward away from the earthly pains? Should we remain depressed and dejected from life because we cannot give birth to a child or shall we move forward and find other avenues of fulfillment?

When a woman discovers she cannot give birth, part of her dies. That death is hard and troubling to both members of the relationship. This is a time that strength is needed for both. Lay the part that has died to rest in peace and move forward with the rest of the relationship and your life together. Life is not over.

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