When To Tell The Parents

If you are going to be asked only one question during the entire time you are at a client’s house, it is “How were the kids?” This can be a tricky question, especially if the children were less than perfect. Do you tell the parents that their children or brats, thus letting them get away with whatever they did? Or do you tell the parents every little thing the children did wrong, making the parents angry; you look bad, and the children grumpy? It can be awkward to tell the parents that their “angels” were acting more like little devils. Here is when you should and when you should not tell the parents about the children’s behavior.

Broken Items. If the children broke anything, other than a pencil or something insignificant, the parents need to be told. If not, another child might be blamed for it, one that was innocent. Or they all might be punished for it, because the parents don’t know. Or, they might even think you are irresponsible if you don’t explain the situation to them.

Hurting a sibling. There are several types of situations that fall under this category that you should report to the parents. If a child hurts another child and leaves a mark, of any kind, you absolutely need to tell the parents for several reasons. First, this is something that needs to be stopped. The child should not and probably is not allowed to do that. The parents need to be aware that this child is doing that. And second, you could be blamed for the mark. This could lead to all sorts of hassles. Child abuse is illegal, and if you haven’t explained to the parents what happened and who did it, they might blame you. Or the children might. Most parents (all of the ones I have babysat for) will be understanding, and are not in the least surprised that their child did that. Most parents would probably assume that the child did that. But don’t take that risk. Talk to the parent about it. They may want to know what you did when that happened. Tell them, and then ask them how they would like that situation handled for the next time if that should happen. This shows that you are trying to help solve the problem and is likely to get you called back.

Doing anything Dangerous. If the child was playing with matches (Especially older ones that should know better) or was doing anything that they might do again and the parents should be aware of it, you need to tell them. You can soften it by saying that you were worried that they were going to get hurt and you just wanted to know exactly what the rules on that were. If you already knew the rule and the child deliberately disobeyed it more than once or twice, tell the parents. It is better to have the parents or the children a little irritated then have a child get hurt seriously while you are in charge.

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