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An Orange Halloween Vegetable

© Joe Jeskiewicz

I'm in recovery. No not any kind of physical therapy recovery. Mental recuperation. I went on a Field Trip last week with my wife's preschool class. We went to the pumpkin farm to go on a hay ride, play on the playground, pick pumpkins, and learn a little bit about farms. We went in preparation for the American holiday of Halloween. I'll just say American because I'm blatantly ignorant about what everyone else does in the world for All Saints Eve.

And we Americans usually have our own way to go about things anyway. But in the spirit of seeing how much kids know I like to try and pull one over on them, frequently, often, far too much. I try so hard that it's great fun to correct me (although my wife thinks perhaps it's a chore and duty to correct me). So the next time ask a kid what they are going to carve for Halloween, I challenge you to not only get them to say Carrot, but to produce a result.

That's right, the great Halloween Carrot. It's a orange vegetable that is capable of being carved. Although I'll admit that it may be difficult to cut a little face in the carrot, being artists I think we can get around the difficulty. Use an X-Acto knife and breath calmly while carving out the inside of your carrot slice and while getting the little eyes and nose and mouth positioned just right. You may want to spend some time looking for a nice big fat carrot at the local grocer, in order to get a little leeway.

You can even light the inside with a birthday candle. And if you do a large number of them (say for instance you've discovered the secret of quickly carving carrot-o-lanterns) you can serve them as a healthy snack at your Halloween party. But why stop there. Why not try go for a Acorn Squash-o-lantern, Cucumber-o-lantern, a traditional turnip-o-lantern, or for the truly talented an Orange-o-lantern. Oranges may not be a vegetable but they are Orange and Round.

People are always looking for something new and unique to mark the advent of another holiday each year. We want to know that our holidays move forward with us and that we are able to out do the previous year in some way, despite the fact that we've been having a Halloween for centuries. As an artist it is your responsibility, nay your duty to put your lateral thinking skills to work and find something fun and safe and exciting to do each new year. It doesn't have to be bigger and scarier, just something to characterize the year as yet another milestone. Something different than the last.

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