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Palestinian Weddings -- American vs. Traditional (Part 2)

© Aida Hasan

It is difficult to hold on to traditions over time. Change in cultural traditions is inevitable. However, because traditions define a people at a given time and place, learning about them is both interesting and necessary. Since many Palestinian traditions may not be practiced anymore, it is important to remember them and record them for posterity. I have always been interested in the traditions that are no longer practiced. For that reason, and because it is rather different than those of today, I am choosing to describe a Palestinian wedding from the 1940's. This wedding description is drawn from my mother's memory of the ceremonies she observed as a young girl in a west bank village of Palestine.

According to my mother, a wedding was a grand affair which was celebrated by the entire village. Even travellers and people from nearby villages were welcomed to the weddings. Everyone in the village knew that a wedding was coming. The family of the groom would go from house to house to personally invite guests with an offering of "makhloota", a mixture of nuts and seeds. In traditional Palestinian weddings, it is the groom's family who pays for and arranges the entire ceremony.

For days and up to a week before the wedding ceremony, family and friends gather night after night for a "sahra" ; a night of singing and dancing. Usually taking place in a large empty field and providing plenty of space for lots of people to gather, the sahra is just as festive as the wedding ceremony itself. It was usually only the men who danced el debka while the women sang. The night before the wedding is the henna party. The bride and all the women gather for dancing, sweets, and the painting of henna on their hands. Henna painting prior to a wedding is an ancient tradition which is sometimes still practiced today.

On the day of the wedding ceremony, the women of the groom's family are very busy preparing a large amount of food for the the large gathering that is to come. The main Arabic dish was "asida"; cracked wheat cooked like rice, which is covered with a layer of rice and large pieces of lamb. This is served in abundance as several trays of it will be prepared. Perhaps the most showy part of the ceremony is when the groom is seated on a horse and paraded through the village for all to see. Wearing the traditional dress of a "kafiyeh", the Palestinian black and white head cloth and an ornate white "abaya" cloak with gold trimming, he rides a horse dressed in a fancy saddle. As the groom rides throughout the village, his family follows singing, clapping and displaying their happiness. By late afternoon, the groom and party return to the groom's family's home and dinner is served.