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Palestinian Weddings-- American vs. Traditional (Part 1)

© Aida Hasan

I have often been asked, by non-Arabs, what a Palestinian Arab wedding is like. I have answered that question by only describing my experiences of attending Palestinian weddings here in the United States. However, Palestinian-American weddings are not "real" Palestinian weddings. While they do contain remnants of the traditional ceremonies my grandparents celebrated, they are still not authentically Palestinian. These old fashioned celebrations witnessed by my mother as a young girl have all but vanished.

A few years ago I had the opportunity to attend a wedding ceremony in my parents west bank home village. I expected and hoped to see a traditional ceremony somewhat like the ones my mother described to me. What I saw was very similar to the weddings I had seen in the United States. Like so many other cultures, Western practices and traditions have mixed with old traditions, making the present day ceremonies in Palestinian society not a thoroughly Palestinian one. The ceremony I had seen was actually a sort of midpoint between those that are celebrated in the United States,and those that were celebrated by the generations before; a ceremony in which old meets new. So, in answering the question what is a Palestinian wedding like? I would really like to include two ceremony descriptions -- a Palestinian wedding ceremony here in the United States, and a traditional West Bank village ceremony of yesterday. Ceremonies vary somewhat with geographical location, religion, and local traditions within Palestinian society. Both ceremonies described here are the traditions of the West Bank (Muslim) village my family hails from and are not necessarily representative of all Palestinian weddings.

A Palestinian Wedding, U.S.A. Style

Palestinian weddings in the United States are similar to many American weddings in some ways. Yet in other ways, they are distinctly Arab. With most Muslim Palestinians, the bride and groom are already married. A small religious ceremony takes place prior to the wedding celebration so that, unlike most weddings, there is no religious figure present. Thus, unless you are a close relative, if you are invited to the wedding, you will be attending the larger ceremony after the religious ceremony. The prefered location is at a large reception hall or a hotel, and the time is usually in the evening. Since large families and strong kinship is very much a part of the culture, anyone even remotely related to the bride or groom is invited, rendering a guest list of anywhere from 300 to 600 people. There is usually a live Arabic band, but in some cases a DJ playing popular Arabic songs. There can be Arabic food served, but in most cases it is American food.

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