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My Year to Remember and Since: Alzheimer's and After, Part III

© Brenda S. Parris

In the months following my mother's death, I began to work on a Web site in her memory. It was just these poems, a few of my journal entries, and some links to Alzheimer's resources. I worked on it at every free moment, and though it was still to be a long road to complete healing, I began to heal as I filled Windows Notepad with pages of HTML built around the story I had to share.

Slowly I began to get on with my life even though tears still flowed at times. In August of that year I got a permanent library-related job again. In September of that year I married again. In November as I was driving back home for my first Thanksgiving without my mother, I wrote a song.

SONG OF ALZHEIMER'S

My mother was so full of life
and living was a joy.
It seemed as she grew older
she just surprised me more.
I saw her as my mother;
I found her as my friend
but that was just before
the beginning of the end.

Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?
Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?

I took care of my mother;
I tried the best I could.
We had some really good times,
but some that weren't so good.
It seems all I can think of--
It haunts me day and night;
Re-living all the bad times
and what I didn't do right.

Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?
Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?

I look into the mirror;
I see my mother's face.
I reach out for something;
I see I have her hands.
I think I have her hair
now that it's turning gray.
I wonder if I'll be like her
in every way?

Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?
Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?

It's in most every family,
everywhere I go;
Someone's losing someone
that they love so.
These should be the best times,
not the very worst.
These are the last times;
Why do they have to hurt?

Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?
Won't somebody please
do something about Alzheimer's Disease?

(Written November 1996 Copyright 1996-2002 Brenda Parris Sibley)

There have been more poems in the years since that expressed my emotions at each stage of healing. Maybe at some time later I will write a article or two to cover them and the significant events of the past few years.

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