How Not To Ride a Lithuanian Bus
The driver is encased in plexiglass. It doesn't look like I'll be getting a ticket from him. I figure a ticket collector will come by. I take a seat, just below the ticket validation thingamajig. As I sit, dozens of people validate their tickets with a click of the metal validator. The tickets are little thin strips of paper that could easily get whipped away in a windstorm. No one comes to collect my money, and the bus lurches forward. I look outside; it begins to rain. No sign of the Old City.
After a few miles, the bus stops and two people, a man and a woman, get on. They use the back door instead of the front. They have official-looking nametags swinging from chains on their necks. They don't speak English, but I know what they want: my ticket. These are the dreaded ticket police, and I am "caught" with nothing to show. The next thing I know, the woman has me by the arm and is pulling me to the front of the bus. Everyone looks. I show her my money. She doesn't care.
I protest, but no one comes to help. It is now clear to her I don't speak much Lithuanian. Her face is stern. The bus stops, and this woman and the man pull me off the bus. They demand about 50 times the price of the ticket. I protest in English, telling them I don't understand why I couldn't just pay the driver. The rain is coming down, and I have no idea where I am. I am more angry than terrified.
Finally the man leaves. I start to walk away, as angry as I think I have ever been. But the woman follows me and leads me back to where the bus dropped me off. The ticket policeman went and found another policeman that spoke some English. He tells me what I already know: I have to pay the fine. Then he tells me something I don't want to know: If I don't, they will take me to the police station. I look beyond his shoulder, and indeed a dark blue police van is parked there, waiting. I can feel tears somewhere deep behind my eyes.
I am so angry -- don't they know I am a Kaleda, of pure Lithuanian stock? Don't they care that I traveled 6,000 miles to come here, to see where my ancestors
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