Being of Service
That remains to be seen. Even more important is that we avoid taking part in any efforts that can be construed as harmful to the one we assist or others with whom they interact. An appropriate response to such situations is to suggest a more harmless approach. If our efforts to avoid doing harm are not accepted by the one we assist it is important that we withdraw our energy and efforts from those harmful directions. Sometimes that is enough to motivate a change in the other but sometimes we have no choice but to terminate our efforts of assistance.
Apportion responsibility carefully. Never take responsibility away from those that you assist. There will often be some confusion or even efforts to avoid responsibility for one's actions. This usually comes from an effort to avoid guilt or shame. Responsibility is empowering. To avoid responsibility is to lose the power to change, to help ourselves. A definition of responsible could be: "Able to respond." The goal of someone in service to others is to assist them rather than doing for them. For someone to become dependent on us means our work is not finished until they can become independent from us.
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